Okay… I’ve been a little busy and have been reaching home feeling too tired to type anything thoughtful. So here is something for you all to read (to the length of 46 pages long). Jump straight through all the administrative descriptions and read our daily reflections from page 16 onwards~!
I committed a horrible error on 20th September. The thought I had back then was if only I had kept in touch with you more often, then most probably you’d be able to sound out the alarm much earlier since you usually know my schedule much better than myself. However, the fact is I’ve been burying myself in many other stuffs but not been updating you. Therefore the clash in personal life and “work” came without me noticing, and I chose work. You’ve expressed your anger and disappointments. I kept my silence because I knew I was in the wrong (and I was stuck in a Catch-22).
It was amazing (to me) how quickly we discussed about the elephant in the room, killed it, and moved on to other topics. Not many other people could get me converse and explain my thoughts as easily as you. Especially when it comes to admitting my mistakes, or explaining my dilemma. I even had the guts to comment how you made things about you even though you were not the protagonist of the event.
Do continue to be my strictest critic, my strongest confidant, and my cesspool for verbal diarrheas. Continue reading
Saw the following on the returning episode of Grey’s Anatomy. The gems of each of Grey’s episodes are always found during the closing moments. Without fail, they bring perfect closures to the themes of the episodes. And the theme of the latest episode was about overcoming grief, with the episode aptly titled “Good Mourning”.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
Grief may be a thing we all have in common, but it looks different on everyone. It isn’t just death we have to grieve, its life, its loss, its change. And when we wonder why it has to suck so much some times, has to hurt so bad, the thing we have to remember is it can turn on a dime. That’s how you stay alive, when it hurts so much you can’t breath, that’s how you survive. I remember that one day, somehow, and possibly you won’t feel this way, it won’t hurt this much. Grief comes in its own time for everyone, in its own way. So the best we can do, best anyone can do, is try for honesty. The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief, is that you can’t control it. The best we can do is to try to let ourselves feel it when it comes. And let it go when we can. The very worst part is the minute you think your past it, it starts all over again. And always, everytime, it takes your breath away.
More quotes from the episode:
According to Elizabeth Kubler Ross, when we are dying or have suffered a catostrophic loss we all move through five distinct stages of grief. We go into denial because the loss is so unthinkable, we can’t imagine it’s true. We become angry with everyone, angry with survivors, angry with ourselves. Then we bargain. We beg, we plead, we offer everything we have. We offer up our souls in exchange for just one more day. When the bargaining has failed, and the anger is too hard to maintain we fall into depression, despair. Until finally we have to accept that we have done everything we can. We let go. We let go and move into acceptance.
穿梭在人群中的你 我 他
没有人能预知，我们明天 还会遇见 谁。
词曲 演唱 制作：蔡健雅
Here are some thoughts that ran through my mind as I looked at all those photos taken on the day that we flew to Mauritius.
I think it was quite hardcore of us for all the dancers who went down for the Dance Reflections 2009 combined preview and danced just three hours before our flight. That was some true professionalism and our dedication~!
I slept throughout the flight to Kuala Lumpur. Didn’t even know that our flight was stuck in queue at Changi Airport for take off for an hour and even made a random loop in its flight.
First proper meal that I took for the day was the in-flight meal provided by Air Mauritius when we were flying from KL to Mauritius. I didn’t have time to eat breakfast and only ate some snacks that Kit bought at KL International Airport. The meal was abysmal. :S The lump of fish was tougher and dryer than overcooked chicken breast. Imagine that. Then again, I shouldn’t expect too much from Air Mauritius, should I?
This trip started off just as a mini-project when everything seemed rather uncertain. Then it became more and more painful as the admin work piled up (including the cover page of the programme booklet you see up there). So much so that I was very much drained by the time I was on the flight. Then excitement and nervousness came as we saw profiles of ourselves published in the center fold of a local newspaper.
Threw all my concerns away and just focused on dancing and having fun. And I got much more than that. I got to know so many more people better; Talked to some of the dancers more in the seven days than the total amount accumulated since I first met them. And there was quite an amazing good mix of “chakras” — Minimal friction and maximum chemistry. It didn’t matter that we were seeing each other almost everyday before and during the trip.
Guess that’s quite a good indication of how we enjoyed each other’s presence. 🙂